# Claude-Tic Audit - Chapter 08 Raw Draft

Audited text: `output/drafts/claude/chapter_08.round_01.md`

Mechanical input: raw gate report `output/critiques/codex/mechanical/chapter_08_raw_quality_gate.md`: 6 OPEN findings, 69 WATCH hits. Open hits were one-sentence paragraph gravity at raw line 9, echo-line poetics at raw lines 15 and 21, simile-as-adverb at raw line 67, and `let himself` at raw line 105. Final integrated chapter gate: PASS open=0, WATCH=64.

- FOUND - tic 1 em-dash/rhythm crutch - raw draft used several explanatory dash appositives. Evidence: raw line 7, "The sink was out — acrylic-gouache"; raw line 31, "weather reports — not negotiable"; raw line 97, "— *it didn't come together*..." ORDER: reduce during integration; final chapter uses colons/commas or separate sentences in these locations.
- FOUND - tic 2 shimmer / elegant abstraction - raw draft occasionally elevated a practical beat into a polished abstraction. Evidence: raw line 51, "the whole shape of the evening"; raw line 79, "opened under a false name"; raw line 101, "the most expensive part of the night." ORDER: keep only where the table evidence earns it; reduce account/deposit density.
- CLEAR - tic 3 recurring mood verbs - checked "mattered," "earned," "weighed," "carried" and adjacent mood verbs. Nearest miss: "costing interest" (raw line 77). It is allowed because the chapter card's debt engine is literalized through table obligations, but density was reduced.
- FOUND - tic 4 default-elegant noun phrase - raw line 113, "one anonymous rectangle in a family of anonymous rectangles." ORDER: replace protected-word figure; final line is "one anonymous rectangle in a row of anonymous rectangles."
- FOUND - tic 5 habitual qualifiers / softening - raw line 31, "occasionally landing on you with suspicious accuracy"; raw line 67, "presumably holding"; raw line 109, "imagine wanting." ORDER: retain Theo uncertainty where character-specific, but cut weather/report shimmer and keep practical object language.
- FOUND - tic 6 narrator-as-philosopher intrusion - raw line 79, "You couldn't make a lie smaller by doing one more thing in secret." ORDER: keep one central recognition because it is the chapter's turn, but surround it with action/table evidence and avoid repeating the thesis.
- FOUND - tic 7 theme gloss after beat lands - raw lines 49-51 explain Luis's transaction and the table's learning after the evidence already appears. ORDER: trim, keep the reader inside object/action.
- FOUND - tic 8 recursive negation / false-profound reversal - raw line 79, "The bin wasn't honesty. The bin was just..." ORDER: retained in revised form because this is Theo's decision hinge, but limited to one direct recognition and checked by final gate.
- CLEAR - tic 9 self-aware meta-clause - no "if that was the word" family. Nearest miss: raw line 31 "declined to examine"; final keeps the avoidance as Theo filing Odile's non-question.
- FOUND - tic 10 over-balanced structures - raw line 13, "both true at once"; raw line 109, "Not the part he'd gotten. The part he hadn't." ORDER: keep one painting-specific duality because it is the accurate stance; avoid expanding into aphorism.
- CLEAR - tic 11 profundity-stamp ending - raw final line "He set the alarm and went home owing everyone" passes because it follows the concrete storage/closing checklist and names the chapter consequence.
- CLEAR - tic 12 lovely/quiet/small default register - the chapter is practical, comic, and culpable rather than lovely. Evidence: final lines 7, 27, 113 are disposal/file/closing mechanics.
- CLEAR - tic 13 physical reaction shortcut - no breath/throat/heartbeat/stomach defaults. Body vocabulary is literal handling and table blocking.

Book-specific additions:

- FOUND - protected-word risk - raw final storage phrase used "family" figuratively. ORDER: remove from final.
- FOUND - route/control repeat risk - no route card appears, but Theo's inventory habit can become Ch06-adjacent. ORDER: keep inventories local to panel/table choices; final chapter does.
- CLEAR - dialogue diagnosis ban - no line rates another character's delivery/phrasing/tone. Nearest miss: "It was the way you said it" is in-character praise of Priya's booth defense, not narration diagnosing dialogue; it survives as light table banter.
- CLEAR - `Winter Kitchen`, Philadelphia/Nia/Asha, first snow, nephew/family reveal - absent from final chapter.

Chapter verdict: TICS-FOUND-AND-REPAIRED.

REVISION ORDERS: executed in `output/chapters/chapter_08.md`; no open tic blocker remains.
