# Chapter 05 Dialogue Repair Memo

Source audit: `output/critiques/claude/chapter_05.dialogue_doctor.md`

## Blocking Findings Accepted

1. Voice convergence / fake-sharp:
   - Raw integrated line: `For the record, your nose left the property on my first one. I want you braced.`
   - Repair: `Mine gave your nose two versions. I should tell you before you see it.`
   - Reason: removes June-like real-estate displacement gag and moves Theo toward practical disclosure.

2. Fake-sharp echo cap:
   - Raw integrated line: `I was born braced.`
   - Repair: `June set her stick on a fresh page. "Too late."`
   - Reason: less quotable, more deflective/action-bound.

3. Dialogue diagnosis / self-caption:
   - Raw integrated line: `and heard how that sounded, and let it stand, because amending it would have been repairing the line.`
   - Repair: cut. The line now ends at `"The card knows what it's doing," June said.`

4. Odile delivery captions:
   - Raw integrated phrases: `to the room and not to the room`; `to everyone and no one`.
   - Repairs: `from the front pair`; `Odile continued up the aisle. "Again. Three minutes."`
   - Reason: makes targeted teaching material/staged rather than captioning delivery.

5. Self-aware-tag stack:
   - Raw integrated Mara line: `I checked, because Luis says I check weather like other people check lottery numbers.`
   - Repair: `Luis says I checked twice.`
   - Reason: preserves Mara's Luis-report tic while reducing shared self-aware-comedy engine.

## Mechanical Follow-Up

The first dialogue repair pass made Chapter 05 fall over the trailing-participle CAP because of word-count/density. I repaired four sentence-shape repeats without altering facts or beats. Final `bash scripts/quality_gate.sh` after repairs: PASS open=0, allowlisted=0, WATCH=327.
